Adjusting…

I’m laying on a floor in a house that doesn’t belong to me. With the way things are going, I’ll be here much longer than I expected. The pandemic has thrown a curve ball but I’ll keep swinging and I know I’ll get my pitch sooner or later.

My son lays next to me on a blow up mattress with a fever that continues to climb. Grayson has always been a fighter. It takes a lot to get him down but over the last 24hrs he just hasn’t been himself. If life was normal then we would be concerned but not worried like we are. Shannon and I haven’t felt this uneasy feeling since Grayson was little. Things are different though. It’s no longer just about, “does he have a cold”, or “could it be the flu?”…now the situation is heightened…the thought a parent has now is “could it be …COVID?” We are almost afraid to even utter the words. We called tonight to some local friends to help us find a place for him to get tested. We can’t get in until Monday so for now we wait and pray his fever breaks and that no one else in the house starts developing symptoms. It’s amazing though, the feeling of being a parent with a sick child. Your instincts kick in and you’ll do whatever it takes to take away their pain. You want to comfort them and love on them. Remind them that mommy and daddy are there. They need that…who am I kidding…we as adults need that and still wish there were days we could have it. I hate this. I hate what is going on. I hate that my son is sick. I hate that we have no answers as to when this will all be over.

i lay here waiting for my pitch..adjusting to life and being there for my son.